Yvonne

Yesterday I went up to visit my grandfather. Which in itself was the weirdest thing...you know, since my grandma wasn't there and all. It sure did make my heart smile to see the surprised and happy look on his face when we walked into the room. And needless to say, he was so much happier by the time we left. But maybe that had to do with the two games of Scrabble that he beat me in.


Anyway, a few rooms over from my grandpa there is a man by the name of Bill. Bill is in his late sixties and appears to have Alzheimer's, but he doesn't. Bill has had two strokes within 6 months of one another, and although he doesn't appear like it...his brain is fully functional and he knows entirely what's going on around him. He has been in the nursing end of the retirement home because the strokes have affected him so severely that his wife cannot take care of him alone. But thankfully he is getting much better and will get to go back home soon.


Bill's wife's name is Yvonne. Yvonne, since her husband's last stroke, has been at her husband's side everyday for the past 9 weeks (and was there after the first stroke as well). She comes in around lunch time and stays there until around when he goes to bed. When she leaves the room, he panics and yells frantically "YVONNE! YVONNE!!!" And sometimes he just yells, simply to yell...because he cannot verbally explain his frustration and how much he is upset. He does NOT like it when she is away from him. When she leaves to go home, they have worked out a system in which she calls him and lets the phone ring twice, just to let him know that she is home safe. Bill can't speak very well, and during the day he will usually sleep as he recovers and maybe will watch some TV in the common room. So, all she does during the day is talk to the nurses who come by and sit by his bedside either reading or watching TV as well. It takes a whole lot of love for a person to sit in a nursing home by their husband's side, not doing much, for 10 hours a day, for 6 months.

"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love." -1 Corinthians 13

While I was talking to Yvonne, she came right out and said for no apparent reason at all "this is what love does." We weren't talking about anything on that subject...but when she said it, it made me stop and think. Suddenly all I wanted was for God to give me someone to grow old with, and that would love me like Yvonne loves Bill, many years down the road from now.


But you know something so awesome? God already has provided someone! My best friend, and my romancer, Jesus Christ. Jesus looks at me just like Yvonne looks at Bill EVERY day, whether I notice him or not. He watches over me with a love that just cannot be described. A love that fulfills everything in my heart that just longs to be loved and told that I'm beautiful and worth something. From watching Yvonne with Bill, I was able to capture only a glimpse of how much Jesus loves me. If the Lord is going to love me like that, wow...what must he think of me? His daughter? His creation?

"O Lord, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O Lord. You hem me in-behind and before; you have laid your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain. Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. If I say, 'Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,' even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for the darkness is as light to you. For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am FEARFULLY and WONDERFULLY made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. How precious to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast the sum of them! Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand. When I awake, I am still with you." -Psalm 139:1-18

"Then God said, "Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth, and over all the creatures that move along the ground.' So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them." -Genesis 1:26-27

So when God created us we were fearfully and wonderfully made, we were created in His image, He knew us before we were created, AND no matter where we go the Lord sees us. That knowledge alone is so awesome. Because now, there really is no reason to doubt how amazing the Lord is and that we are his pride and joy! Why? Well, God isn't going to make anything that isn't perfect in his eyes, because everything reflects the BEAUTY of God. And because God knew us before we were ever created and ALL of our days were written down before we ever walked the earth, that means...he had a plan for us a LONG time ago. There is purpose for us and he put time and effort into making us who we are. If we were supposed to be any different than who God created us today, then we would look different or have different talents and abilities. But because we aren't like that person who we compare ourselves to all the time...our future and purpose is different from theirs. So there is no reason for us to have the exact talents or looks as that person who we wish we were. There is a reason the Lord created us the way that we are, and we should REJOICE in that! We are a special, and an original creation. There is something specific that we alone were created to do. There is NO ONE else like us. That's pretty awesome.


And although I personally am waiting patiently (or at least trying to) for the man that God wants to put into my life and I really do want the Lord to put him there sometime soon...I can continue to rest in His presence, getting the fulfillment of love from the Lord instead of from a human being. I can continue to live my life and do his will, and the Lord will put him there when it is time. The knowledge that all I have to do is go after God will all my heart and that someone will be brought to walk alongside me somewhere down the line, just brings joy and peace to my heart and soul because I know that his will is absolutely perfect for me. And I can't wait! God is so good.

And thank you Yvonne, for reminding me of Jesus' love and how much fulfillment it provides!